your not the only one who gets hurt and confused.
Remember that;

I honestly thought you had changed, I stood up for you when no one else did, I had hope that you really weren't who everyone said you were, and the worst thing is, I trusted you.
But once again, you let me down.

i dont know how you make me feel, but i like it.

Did i miss something?

When did everybody suddenly get so judgemental and why is it suddenly not alright to be different?

I shouldn't have to feel like some alien from another planet, just because im not like everyone else. I am who i am and no one can change that, if you dont like me thats your problem not mine. Just dont make me feel like im not good enough.

"It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not."

How do i even begin to say goodbye, when i was told it was a time a million things ran through my mind that i wanted to say. But when i saw you.. it all just dissappeared. Sometimes i wish it could be me not you. You are an inspiration to me and i hope to be just like you one day. You have been fighting for a long long time, my whole life in fact. And i get that your done, im proud of you for comming this far. I just hope you know, we all love you so much and i will always look up to you.

"Don't let the saddness of your past and the fear of your future, ruin the happiness of your present."

I used to believe in forever. . .  but forever was too good to be true.
- Winnie the Pooh

" If ever there is tomorrow when were not together, there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if were apart.. I'll always be with you, in your heart."
- Winnie the Pooh

Girl, you have no idea how much i truly love you. You mean the world to me, i wouldn't be who i am if it wasn't for you. You made me, me. The real me, and made me confident and accept myself the way i am. Even if i am a tiny bit weird.You wake me up too reality and make my days as happy as dreams. I will never ever forget you. I'm actually kind of hurt you thought i would.  I will be yours, forever and ever and ever and ever.
I love you so much

Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen closely. - The Land Before Time

I need you, i want you, i even think i love you, but the thing is..  i cant have you.

All i really want is for you to be happy, i just wish i was the one who made you feel that way.

Some people reffer to me as a bit of a FREAK.  I may not be 'normal' and i guess you could call me one of the 'gay' kids. But i am who i am, dont try change me. Just accept who i really am.

Boy, when did everyone get so judgemental. Why cant everyone just accept people for who they are. So what if people arent exactly the same as you. If they were life would be boring. But please, dont make people feel like they arent good enough. Because deep down it really hurts them. Just accept everyone how they really are. They are probably an amazing person if you just give them the chance to be their own.

This photo brings tears to my eyes, sort of like the ones in hers. But instead i feel hurt because she, and many other people are going through great pain that i cant help. Its photos like this one that makes you realise how lucky we really have it. Every three and a half seconds someone dies from hunger and other poverty related things. Every fucking three and a half seconds. That's not long, not long at all. While these people are dieing and starving we are throwing out leftover food because we have too much, where as they have to little. Its not fair, not one tiny bit. I just wish there was more i could do. . .

      Music is my life;

"Don't frown. You never know if someone is falling in love with your smile."

I think about this quote a lot, but for some reason im having trouble following it. I might try tell myself and others that im okay and really theres nothing wrong. But im finally saying there is. I dont know what im feeling, or why im feeling it. But what i do know is im just simply not happy. Im trying my hardest to put on a brave face and carry on like nothings wrong. The truth is, im tired. Tired of waking up every morning and seeing the same thing in the mirror; a sad, unconfident, lonely teenager. Im confused about everything and evryone, i just dont know what to do anymore.

Attika Stahl and Jade Carrucan,

you are both truly amazing. I love you oh so dearly, you both mean a heck of a lot to me.  I know things havent exactly been the best between us lately, and that i havent really being hanging out with you as much. But i do still love you and you will always be two of my closest friends.  Love you both millions and billions.

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to let us down probably will. You will have your heart broken, probably more than once. You will break hearts too, so remember how it felt when someone broke yours. You will fight with your best friend and maybe even fall in love with them. You will blame a new love for the things an old did. You will cry because time is passing too fast and you will eventually lose someone close to you. So take to many pictures, laugh to much and love like you’ve never been hurt. Every sixty seconds you spend angry or upset is a minute of happiness you will never get back.

I am so glad your still a part of my life, i honestly dont know what i would do with out you.  At first things were hard and i didnt want anything to do with you, but now that ive let you in again, your one of my best friends. You always seem to know when something is wrong and how to cheer me up again. Thanks for waking me up, and always being here for me. Bestieism  :)

Summer

all a girl needs is sunshine, a hammock and a guy to wait on her hand and foot. . .

. . . im still waiting on the last two, but at least for now i have claire and her hammock.

shoe box of memories

The best thing about a photo is that it never changes, even when the people in it do.



Everybody changes, not always at the same time or in the same way.

Same change for good, others for bad.

Dont be afraid to change yourself or if others around you are changing.

Just remember to stay true to yourself and accept things the way they turn out.

Forever song. . .

We sleep together,
While all around us,
People kill each other where they lie.
They lie together,
Till they find someone better,
Try to negotiate that slow demise.

But I just can't credit,
That type of effort for a,
Piece of nothing on the edge of a knife.
Slices you so thin,
You dry like sheets in the wind,
Hold a candle behind through you see the light.

I want the song I can sing forever,
I don't care for structure,
Just to know it's mine.
I'd hate to see,
This thing we've developed,
Become your burden or my waste of time.
(My waste of time)

The afternoon can bring with it shallow moods,
But I'd jump a harbour wall to clear your mind.
I quarter the years,
You drop the sails till we're clear,
I'll look for reefs,
You map the stars in the night.

And history tells us of worlds we'll know nothing of,
Then retrospect becomes a shackle tight,
On the ankles of us,
Oh, in the future we trust,
We cross our fingers like some kids telling lies.

I want the song I can sing forever,
I don't care for structure,
Just to know it's mine.
I'd hate to see,
This thing we've developed,
Become your burden or my waste of time.

I wanna know that I know what I'm talking about.
Until I do,
All the walls seem white.
But when I'm sure that I know what I'm talking about,
I'll take your burden if you say it's mine.

Josh Pyke, i love you!

Payback bitch

CLAIRE DAVIE  What can i say, i love you more than you could ever imagine.  You stood by me when others didnt and never judge me for who i am, a weird retarted little shit. Im sorry for worrying you all the time, spitting cordial on you and doing embarrasing little things at the dinner table. I hope you know, you mean the world to me, i wouldnt be the person i am today if it wasnt for you.  I want you to know that i will always be here for you like you have been for me.

Eye love you, cool active dinosaur xxx

fairy bread

i miss being a kid, i miss the simple days where the biggest drama in my life was when i couldnt find my favourite teddy or my favourite coloured pencil went blunt.  Everything was so easy back then, i used to build cubbies with my brothers out of chairs and blankets. We would spend all day in there not having a care in the world.  I wish i could do that again, ive tried it by myself but its not the same as it was with them. Now i my brothers have grown up, they no longer enjoy just having fun and acting silly, instead they are throwing their lives away doing all sorts of stupid dangerous things like drugs and alcohol.  I wish i could tell them how i feel, but why would they listen or care. Im just their little sister. Josh and i spend a lot of time together still, we go up into his room and watch disney movies.  I love it, its one of my favourite parts of the day.  I feel like a little kid again, watching my favourite classics with my brother. For a couple of hours i forget about everything else, and instead think about whoever made the lion kind is a genious. I worrie about my brothers alot, i just hope they realise what they are doing is stupid before its too late.

monkey bars

Life is like crossing monkey bars, you eventually have to let go in order to move forward.

Someone once told me we forgive those we love because we think we need them in our lives. But nobody ever needs anyone, we just want them. So unless they are truly worth it and make you happy, forgive but let go so they dont get the chance to hurt you again.

knock knock

i thought i still missed you, i thought i needed you back.  Then it came across me, its not you that i miss. Its what we had, i miss having someone to tell everything to and someone i could just cuddle up with. I miss the feeling of being loved, and how every night before bed you would tell me I'm beautiful and special and that you love me. You will never understand how much you truly hurt me, but i thank you for it. If i hadn't gone through that hurt i wouldn't be who i am today and i wouldn't have realised whats really important and who really matters.

A second chance

"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said that it would be easy; they just promised it would be worth it." 

Some times you just have to forget what you feel, and remember what you deserve.